Day 1 is over

So, I finished day one of the Master Cleanser. It wasn't that bad. Particularly better now that I know not to make it with the cayenne pepper. Which reminds me, I need to get some pepper pills to cleanse out my nostrils.

With day two starting, I'm a bit hungry, but right now it's managable. We'll see how I fare tomorrow.

Don'tcha hate it when you can't remember...?

I'm gonna start this with "PAIN HURTS!"

So, yesterday, I went to the periodontist to get an inflamed area of my gum removed per Hot Lesbian Dentsit's request. (and there went the remaining balance on my insurance for the year)

They gave me some "happy pills" that they said would knock me out. An hour after taking the pills, I was like "I'm nowhere near sleepy" - they said "it won't put you to sleep.. just make you not remember." - I said "Heck with that, I wouldn't mind remembering... I'm now over my fears." -- and apparently I said a few strange things while I was "under" -- like something about taking a pregnancy test again. I remember splotches, and that itself drives me nuts. Remind me not to be put under like that again (except maybe when my wisdom teeth are removed.. but they best put me TOTALLY under for that).

Last night, when I miraculously got home (my roommate picked me up -- I don't remember the trip home, but I do remember going to CVS -- and I vaguely remember getting my blood pressure checked on that machine, but that's it. Apparently we went to Publix -- which I have a LITTLE haze of -- so I could get some pudding). I took a pain pill (It began with M) and it knocked me out SOLID. I woke up in time for Prison Break though. After Prison Break, I had an urge for something "more solid" than pudding, so I went to Lee's Golden Buddha #7. They suggested this noodle soup which was GREAT. And that's when the "Silly Putty Bandages" came out. Then I started feeling some of the stitches and one of them was entirely too long, so I spent a couple mins with scissors in my mouth trying to cut it down an eighth of an inch. THAT was an adventure.

So, now I'm STARVING because anything I can eat I don't want because I want solid foods. But I did go to Publix and got some pasta salad stuff that I mistakenly thought was much closer to room temperature than it is. The inside of my mouth is a little swollen, and I'm here at work without pain killers because they put me to sleep (although, I only get pain when there's any temperature change in my mouth). And I can barely remember what was done to put me in pain.

All in all, after this, once I get my wisdom teeth removed, Extreme Makeover Dental Edition will soon be over because Invisalign will be the last step! I feel great (except these hunger pangs and occasional taste of blood)...

My Water Broke...

or I broke my water... whichever you prefer..

Either way, I gots a plumber on his way over.

I'm gonna try to get more active in posting blogs. It's a little difficult for me to remember. I now have a video camera, so I might do a youtube vlog thing. Not totally sure yet.

What's y'alls opinions?

WTF is Variegate?

So, I was eating some Mayfield Peanut Butter Cookie Dough Ice Cream. I read the little description thinggie and it described it as "Cookie dough-flavored ice cream with a peanut butter variegate and cookie dough pieces."

I got to wondering -- first, what is a variegate. Then wondering who in Athens, TN knows what a variegate is.

I don't fathom myself as having an extensive vocabulary. In fact, I know I use words incorrectly left and right. But, generally I like to think I've heard of words that are on my food (outside of the monosodium glutimate and such in the ingredients). If you're going to describe a food, use ordinary words.

So I went to dictionary.com and looked up variegate and found this:

variegate Pronunciation Key (vair-ee-i-geyt, vair-i-geyt)
tr.v. variegated, variegating, variegates

1. To change the appearance of, especially by marking with different colors; streak.
2. To give variety to; make varied.

I'm confused first because dictionary.com references it as a verb, and it's used as a noun in the description. Then I'm even more confused as to why they didn't say "a peanut butter swirl."

Maybe Mayfield thinks their target audience is much more intelligent than me. I'm pondering on partaking in the purchasing of their products after this post.

Something for a penny? Scary and TRUE

So, I did the strangest thing yesterday. I purchased something for $.01!

No, I didn't use coupons. No, it's not price after rebate. The actual price on the register receipt is $.01. (Maybe I'll scan it if people need proof)

I went to Wal-Mart to buy stuffs. I bought a lot more than I intended, but I was at the Super Wal-Mart and was getting the ingredients for my chili (which I have named "2"). One of the ingredients I need is a jalapeño. So I bought one.

I got to the register and the cashier was like "One?" - I said "Yeap" -- "Only one?" -- "That's all I need" -- she puts it on the scale, enters the PLU, and it rings up as $.01 (they're $.79/lb)

So, for everyone who gets pissed off at WalMart, here's what you do: Go in, and purchase 1 jalapeño. And pay for it with your credit card. It'll cost Wal-Mart more to process the transaction than you paid! (Note, I do NOT recommend doing this if you want to keep their prices low low low)

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas

Whelp, I survived Vegas. Went there on a business trip for a conference (Hyperion Conference, for those of you who care). I didn't do a lot while I was there outside of the conference (they had us going and going and going)

Firstly, I didn't lose a ton of money. I didn't win any money either. Gambling really ain't my thang. I wasn't even enthralled while I was playing the slots.

I did climb the rock wall one of the Vendors had at the conference. Made it all the way to the top! I'm pondering posting the photo in my pictures section.... it's a REALLY bad angle and I look FAT (Ok, I've got some weight on me, but I swear I don't look THAT bad)

The "Dinner and Entertainment" night SUCKED MAJORLY though. It was supposed to start at 7:30 and they had like 4000 people shoved in this small area and didn't open the doors to the dining hall until just after 8pm. There was no organization on seating.... All of our group didn't get to sit together... and there were a bunch of people in there who shouldn't have been there. Half of our group didn't even get to go. We started out with a Circque de Soleil like act... I was highly impressed. Then Dana Carvey was supposed to be our entertainment, but he unexpectedly got sick. Instead we had this other guy. Maybe you heard of him.... Jason Lemon... no, that's not right.. Jay Limo... no... Jay Leno... yeah, that's it.. Jay Leno was our entertainment... he was HILARIOUS. (I've now decided I have the "fat virus")

Vegas WAS a lot of fun though. And, I know they say "what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas" -- but since nothing happened in Vegas, well, nothing stays there ;-)

I've got ponderances to go back... it's expensive tho, so I'll have to win the lottery or something. I'd enjoy getting to see everything on the strip (maybe see hot guys strip?) and get to enjoy myself.

On another note, my grandmother goes to Tampa on the 9th. On that date she'll have been with me almost a full month. As of now, she's been with me for 2.5 weeks. When she came down, she was kinda relying on a cane and BARELY made it up to the third floor. A week later, she was "jumping baby gates" to put some of my clothes away (there's ANOTHER story there, which I will NOT post here), and while I was in Vegas, she took Bradley up and down the stairs several times a day. I'm happy she's doing so much better. I've got a bad feeling it may be her house that's killing her... I mean, there's YEARS of smoke in her house that's just embedded into the walls and all. Part of me is sad to see her sell her house (if she does it), but part of me is thrilled that she'd get a change of scenery and environment that would allow her to feel 15 years younger than her stature of 82.

Work's also a bit insane. Server Consolidation (SCON) is driving me beyond insane. I think I gained a few grey hairs.

What do "my butt hurts" and "marathon" have in common?

No, not that, you sicko!

Yesterday, I biked 26.2 miles on the Silver Comet Trail. The first time I was on my bike this year. I'm a little exhausted today, but it's all good.

The strange thing is everytime I get all worked out, my appetite goes away. I don't understand, but yesterday I biked that distance -- and ate like next to nothing. I didn't have that much of an appetite today. Maybe it'll help me lose some of my weight I want to drop.