The next step of Extreme Makeover Dental Edition is straightening my teeths. Something I've wanted to do for years, but that insane fear of dentists kept me away from doing.
I've gotten the rest of my problems taken care of. My gums are in much better shape thanks to my hot lesbian dentist and hot gay periodontist. My cavities are filled in, and I have a crown (I like to call it a tiara tho) over my root canal. The only things that are really left are straightening and replacing the tiara because it has metal that my gums aren't liking.
So, the plan is to straighten my teeths, then replace the tiara because it's easier that way.
The plan to straighten my teeth is to use Invisalign. My hot lesbian dentist does them. I got my appointment squared away for yesterday. She also says I can do some whitening (using the Invisaligns as trays) for an additional $100. Seriously thinking about it.
So, I arrive at the dentist office at 15:56 for my 16:00 appointment. Apparently she was running a little behind because the person in front of me had a lot of work going on. I wasn't concerned. I was in their place before. I see the staff that has worked on my mouth and I'm like "So, you're ganging up on me now with my boyfriend, eh?" (He had an appointment that morning and they got him on a thing to make sure I floss more. C'mon.. EVERYONE needs to floss more!). Then at 16:20, I get called back for my X-Ray.
It's that panoramic X-Ray thing. I seriously should ask if I could get a copy of that emailed to me. It'd be cool to show. (Ok, the X-Ray that has my five wisdom teeths would be cooler to show). The machine stopped working just before it went to take the picture. So I had to get out of there, have them fix it up, then get repositioned again. Cool machine, but I hate having to stand REALLY STILL for it to rotate around my head.
Back in the waiting room I went for a few more minutes. Then they call me back for the impressions.
I wanted to do my Scooby Doo impression, but I've been sick and can't exactly perform then. Of course, that's not the impressions they wanted.
They fit me for these funky trays. I'm apparently an "Extra Large" mouth. (No jokes, please)
Then Hot Lesbian Dentist comes in. They goop up the tray with this purple stuff (which has a mild mint flavor, but not really... kinda gross) and they dry the top of my mouth. I'm told to open wide as she shoves it in my mouth and holds it into place. About 3 minutes later, they're like "It's going to feel like I'm pulling your teeth out" as they remove it. It did feel like they were pulling them out, but they stayed.
At first, that impression looked good. But there was a problem with it.
They decided to go to the bottom. Dry that out... Goop it up... and apply. Then I hafta stick my tongue out (you know how difficult that is with fingers in your mouth?). Three minutes... and pull... That stuff wasn't tasting any better.
We went back to the top. Another impression... 3 minutes... take it out... Nope. "Did I mention we're perfectionists?", Hot Lesbian Dentist asks.
Back to the bottom. Goop... Dry... Insert... 3 minutes... pull... Oohh, a nice one!
Back to the top. Goop... Dry... Insert... 1 minute in, she sees we're missing part of a tooth. Still have to wait the three minutes, though.
Again with the top. Goop... Dry... Insert... 2 minuets in, she sees we're missing parts of one side of my mouth. Grrr... Although the purple goop is starting to taste "acceptable."
Again with the top. We now know what the problems are. Goop.... Dry... Insert... She's looking around... It's looking good.... 3 minutes later and VOILA! I made a good impression!
She showed me the difference between the impressions. We're taking something very minor, but I understand the whole ordeal as to why it has to be pretty much perfect. Invisaligns don't have much room for error.
Then we had to do the bite impression. This time it's grey stuff. She has me open wide and she goops up my bottom teeth. Tells me to bite down and this time it's only for a minute.
Of course, NOW is when I decide I have to start coughing since I'm sick. But, I manage to make it. A minute later, I'm told to open my mouth. Of course, I can't. With help, I get open. Great impression!
Two metal like things are inserted in my mouth to help open wide. She takes a few shots. Then she needs the biting surfaces and shoves a mirror in my mouth. I'm told to smile as she takes a couple more pictures. You know how hard it is to smile with a mirror in your mouth?
The last three shots were of me against the wall. There's a "smiling shot", a "mug shot", and then a side shot.
Then we went back in and she told me what's going to be done with my teeth. Where we want things moved and rotated and the like. I should like it!
In four weeks, I'll be getting a video and such as to what is going to happen with my teeth. All this will be posted on this blog. Once I give the OK, two weeks later, I'll start the straightening! I'll keep y'all posted!